I'm sick of it all.
I'm sick of having to wake up in the morning and going to work.
I'm sick of getting home at midnight.
I'm sick of missing out on everything.
I'm sick of not having any friends.
I'm sick of not having a caring and supportive family.
I'm sick of the world.
I'm sick of people.
I am sick because no matter how POLITE or helpful I am no one give a flying f***.
I am sick because no matter how hard I try to keep going no one cares.
I am sick of being the only one who cares.
I am sick of the fact that my own family belives me to be a layabout and goodfornothing.
I am sick of the fact that my own sister will accuse me of random things whenever she is pissed off at the world, regardless of whether they are true or not.
I am sick of people who do not clean up after themselves, no matter how much I remind them.
I am sick of being pitied.
I am sick of being looked down on.
I am sick of being a loser.
I am sick of being an incomplete female.
I am sick of my memories.
BUT
Mostly,
I am just SICK of
LIFE.
9 comments:
Cheer up Kitty
there isn't anyone in this world has the satisfaction not only u all of us the same ,but the problem is if we let this black thoughts control us it will be disaster,u still young,every thing will come by days don't be hurry.
keep smile in ur face ,the life is coloured not just black and white.keep writing this will help u to deal with urself.
take care
awww thanks.
Thats what I use my blog for - to complain!
I'm ok now Alhamdulillah.
I was just upset and frutrated and wrote to get it out of me. I am very lucky and I know that. I live a good and blessed life and Allah is generous.
But sometimes I just gotta complain!
"I only complain of my grief to Allah" .....Prophet Yaqoob (as) :-)
So I guess we are allowed to complain...
But to Allah (swt)
Glad you are feeling better...Alhamdulillah!
You know what, very recently I was very very very frustrated because of some stuff and people acting just plain silly really. So you know what I did? I just pulled back and kept away from everyone! Now I have hardly any friends and it is a true Blessing from Allah (swt)! 'Coz one day I just got sooooo fed up, I picked up my phone, deleted everyone's numbers, got rid of their email addresses etc and then realised a few people had stuff belonging to me and I was a big buggered because I couldn't ring them and ask for it back :s. But you get the picture!
Allah (swt) tests us in different ways and sometimes sis we do get sick of it all. I was so sick of it all that I became physically ill. And Allah (swt) Brought me mercy through the rash decision that I made on one frustrated occassion!
Now I can reflect on life and deen properly without distraction. I see the whole mess I was in as a training...the thing which I became so sick off made me so much wiser and stronger Alhamdulillah.
You may be sick of your life at the moment...but it is a test and a training from Allah (swt)...maybe He (swt) has an even greater role for you yet...
P.s. I'm your mate!!!!!!!!! And I'm coming down to london very soon Insha'Allah yaaayyy! Get ready to see me :-)!!!
lol - i get frustrated and sick and impatient quite often but I realise its all a big test. The reason I get frustrated is - cos I feel I've been tested for so so soooooo long that I'm tired. But Allah never gives you a burden you cannot bear - so I put my trust in Allah and know that He knows best.
But patience - I never had a lot of it!
:-)
oh no kitty whats wrong? sorry missed your call over the weekend was really busy with the whole course.
speaks laters
Think about Prophet Yusuf (as) and Prophet Ayoob (as) who were tested for such a looooong period of their lives yet remained patient and steadfast.
When Ayoob's (as) wife had had enough, she asked him to pray to Allah for help and shifaa but what was his reply....he asked her how many years had he experienced happiness and to compare that to the period of pain he was going through...there was no comparison. He chose to remain patient....
I know life can be tough at times sis but know that ...'after hardship comes ease, truly after every hardship comes ease'.
PS. you know me.
LOL
"PS You know me"???? Hmmm....now I'm curious.
And when I am being tried I do try and be patient - and believe, normally I am never patient. Patience is something I have built up through the years.
And even when I am running out of patience and feel hard-done-by and full of self pity, I do still remember that I am one of the blessed few who has Islam, a home, a family, food to eat.....
The problem isnt being tried - the problem is the length of it,I think, for me. I think it just starts to grate on u after a while and u just cant ever see the end.
Oh well..
True say...patience is a characteristic you acquire and develop over time and comes with experiencing trials/tests.
I know what you mean about the 'length of the trial' but that is part of the test isn't it, hence the example of the Prophets I gave -you know Allah tests those who are close to Him....the sahabas (ra) used to worry when they weren't tested, subhan'Allah...they used to worry and be concerned about this so alhamdolillah for whatever test we face as this a) brings us closer to Allah, b) is an expiation of our sins and c) i dunno (just though I'd add that for a laugh)
Insha'Allah I pray your worries are ended soon and Allah answers all your duas and rewards you with good insha'Allah.
BTW - that list of things you are sick of - delete it from your mind and know that EVERYONE cares...and the One that Cares about you the most is ALLAH (swt) - He has love for you which is 70x greater than that of a Mother, so when you think you are alone, think of Him and know you are never alone.
What more can you want when Allah is with you?!
PS. Are you still curious as to my identity??? Well keep guessing...I'm sure you'll work it out soon.
i love you lots hunnie
i'm deffo not sick of you,
missing you
am sorry im such a poor friend at the mo, im just a boring person.....
look forard to seeing you soon whenever inshaAllah
Love K
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